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I have a 12 month old, there was an age where he became easier to entertain and some days are easier than others.  My son likes the outdoors.  If I want him to be content playing, we go outside and he plays in the grass. For some reason just being outside turns him into a different child.  I do the same thing when I have a hard time winding him down for a nap...put him in the stroller and go for a walk. 

I do not use CIO. My son doesn't just cry for 5 minutes, he starts to whale, screams, the longer you wait, the louder he gets.  You can definitely tell he is getting stressed.  I understand what you are going through though, I work full time also.  While I was breastfeeding, I co-slept with my son.  He has recently self-weaned and is taking a bottle now.  I definitely feel the difference. I slept better when he was next to me. At 12 months he still doesn't sleep through the night, he wakes up anywhere from 1-3 times.  He usually wants a bottle, which i am slowly switching from milk to water and hopefully can phase out. I find myself very tired and unable to catch up on my sleep.  With all that said there are times when he is more like whining instead of crying and I will let him do that for a while before going to him, if he is just whining he sometimes puts himself back to sleep and sometimes he is asleep doing it.

 

Hi All -

I'm new to the site and thought I would post. I have a 10-month old son who was a fussy baby - would cry all day unless I was pushing him in the stroller or bouncing him on the ball. He slept well at night once we got him to sleep but would not nap at all during the day. I found that I could get him to sleep if I wrapped him tight and bounced him on a stability ball very hard. Actually it was a little weird how much I had to bounce him to get him to sleep - he seemed to need soooo much swinging/bouncing motion. The fussiness got a bit better by 6 months though and we thought it was going to improve gradually.

Two months ago I eliminated all dairy from his diet due to gastro issues he was having - and miraculously they cleared up, his dry skin/eczema cleared up completely and he was much less fussy. So I thought it was the end of his fussiness - even though I felt soooo bad for not knowing about the dairy problem. My guy must have been in pain for so long 

Anyway - it didn't go away - my fussy baby has turned into a fussy pre-toddler. He is 10 months now and not crawling (he was 1 month prem), so depends on me to get him from sitting to standing to lying down. I'm not sure if he should be doing these things by now, but he doesn't which worries me. But what he does do is whine all day long. All day - every exhale is whining. I really think I am going insane. He seems to want something all the time but I have absolutely no idea what it is - he just looks at me with an unhappy expression and whines so loudly. It's like a whine/cry/yell sound - but he's not actually crying. Can anyone relate to this? I don't know if he is frustrated about not being able to crawl, or not being able to communicate. I have been doing signing with him since he was 6 months, but I don't think he has any idea. I don't know if he even knows who we are actually. He doesn't seem comforted by me at all, and is the same whether I am there or in the other room. I am so worried about him. I feel like he is losing out on everything being so unhappy - he doesn't really play, just for a few minutes before losing interest.

Well I've gone on long enough - I could post so much more - arg

Well, I definitely have let go of my expectations where my son is concerned...and I try hard to make allowances for other areas of my life (like learning to deal with little time alone, doing most of the housework, etc).  What I'm having a hard time with is finding a balance I can live with.  I still need some free time, and some help with chores would be nice!  And I'm dying to just go on a date with my husband!  I see him every day, but I miss him!  But I don't have anyone to watch our son, and I can't afford a babysitter.  I struggle every day wondering if I should get a part time job, whether or not it would be worth it or just complicate things.  I hope I can find some answers soon.

I am a third time mom who is getting her first chance to be at home with her baby.  Roxanne is now 16 months old.  She was/is a reflux baby.  This time last year was miserable - things are better now but it has been a hard won victory.  My older two girls spat up a lot but were not in pain.  With Roxanne, the opposite was true.  And we moved 200 miles away 6 weeks after she was born so I lost all of my support network and health care providers.  But I have come out the other side and have learned tons as a result.  I also have been an acupuncturist for the past 11 years so I have learned a lot about natural treatments for my kids.  It has been quite a journey.  And I am no where near through!

My 16 month old has had reflux from 3 weeks of age.  Zantac wasn't enough so we put her on Prevacid starting at 3 months old.  It was a godsend.  In the last 6 months I have been working to get her off of it and have found a combination of probiotics and a Chinese Herbal remedy called Quiet Treasure have made it possible to get her down to once a week doses of Prevacid.  Her doctor says once a week should be meaningless but if I don't give it to her, she starts getting fussy again.  I should let you all know that I am an acupuncturist and Chinese herbalist so I am very comfortable with Chinese herbs.  I got Quiet Treasure from a company called Energetix and it is very safe for children, with a dosage specific to a child's weight.  If you have any questions, let me know.  This summer was a much happier summer than last year!

I'm no expert or anything, but from my experience, some CIO isn't that bad.  If I didn't leave my son (almost 9 months) to cry himself to sleep at night sometimes, he'd never go to sleep.  Last night was a good example.  My husband put him in his crib and we let him cry for about 5 minutes.  I knew he wasn't going to fall asleep so I had my husband go and get him again.  He rocked him for awhile until he calmed down and looked sleepy, put him back in the crib and he ended up crying some more.  This went on a few hours before we just had to let him go because it was already 10pm and we had to be up at 4.  Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do.  I generally let my son cry, but I only do it when he isn't doing that intense, tears-rolling-down-the-face crying.  I have limits and I try to stick to them, but if I didn't leave him cry for awhile, I'd never get anything done.

I don't work, but I DEFINITELY know how it feels to be a walking zombie every day.  Sometimes I wish I did work just so I could get away from the demands of taking care of a baby like this.

I am new to this site and I have to reply to Wits End, even though it has been a few months.  I really hope things have improved for you since you posted in June.  I think it is more common than any of us realize for mom's with colicky babies to have these feelings.  And for all those mom's out there who have not had a fussy baby, don't judge!  I found it extremely difficult to talk about my screaming baby with my friends who had never experienced it because they could not understand or empathize with my feelings.  I could tell that they were thinking that they would never think negatively about their child if they were in my shoes.  As if they had any idea what I was going through.  What bothers me most is that colic is supposed to magically end after 3 months and, if you are lucky enough for that to happen, then everyone just assumes that all is fine.  But the scars from colic stick around.  It screws up your relationship with your child right at the most crucial bonding time and that can have long term effects.  Really good (read: non-judgmental) support is so crucial right now, for your mental health.  I really hope you are getting it!!

My 16 month (still) has reflux but before she got diagnosed, I tried Colic Calm.  I can't really say whether or not it helped.  If it did, it certainly was not immediate.  I never tried Mylicon.  What seemed to help the most was putting her in a warm bath.  She would stop crying for the duration of her time in it but then start back up again when we would get her out.

Yes, I can empathize with you too b/c we have decided the Mommy and Me groups just aren't for us. My little one can't sit on my lap for any duration of time. He needs to be held and walked around and it doesn't seem to work during the get togethers, so unfortunately we had to quit.  I'm hoping we can rejoin when he is older and less high maintenance.